Last night I accepted an invitation to drinks with the guy I met through Chemistry last weekend. I was looking forward to getting out and enjoying a couple of beers with some good conversation.
I had already told this guy that I was not looking for anything right now and really wasn’t into dating, but figured there is no harm in meeting someone new. He’s local and going through a divorce so at least we had that in common.
I arrived at the bar and he had already been waiting. I typically opt for meeting at a diner or restaurant … places where you are not seated closely or sitting right next to someone at a bar… and I came to realize pretty quickly that I am not a fan of this situation at all!
Strike one: Immediately he began resting his feet on my chair. This was my first feeling that my personal space was being invaded. Seriously, I think on a first meeting you should be extremely respectful of the other person’s space. I am not a closey-close kind of person right off the bat and this made an already uncomfortable situation even more so.
Strike two: Drilling me on what I like/dislike and trying to validate yourself with each answer. Do guys really think that this will convince me they are my perfect match? Maybe I should have just been raw and honest and broke him down piece by piece as to why I already knew I wasn’t feeling it?
Strike three: As if the foot on my chair isn’t enough invasion… please don’t rest your knee against me. We just met! There is no reason what so ever that any of your body should be touching mine. So back off and recognize that I am inching away every time to try this move. Not to mention I have totally turned my body away from you at this point.
Last and final strikes: Under no circumstance what so ever is it appropriate to grab a woman’s hand and hold on to it. This happened TWICE! The first time was early on and he wanted to see my wrist tattoo… ask me and I will be happy to give you a good view of it, but grabbing my hand and holding it is a major DON’T.
The second time he grabbed both my hands to look at my nails and just held on to them! WHAT THE HELL!? This was so inappropriate. I said “can I have my hand back??” and pulled away.
I wonder what the other people at the bar thought of us. I wonder how obvious it was that I was totally not feeling this guy. I wish someone had stepped in to save me.
So, in conclusion – the beer was excellent but the company was far too intrusive. Not to mention our conversation consisted of what I like/dislike, his soon to be Ex Wife who still lives with him, and Cats. *yawn*
Maybe it’s just me? Are there any women out there who like this sort of behaviour?
